Well guys, it hasn't been too terribly long since I last wrote but it feels like a lot has happened. I should have cautioned you with this: It's not good news. I can't say a lot of individual things have happened, but they've been big things. First of all, I still haven't heard back from my school about my money situation which is getting extremely frustrating. I'm sure it will happen soon enough, but at this point I'd take any sort of correspondence as a good sign. I could use some good signs.
Classes have been good so far. They're boring, but that's to be expected since what I study is so much theory and philosophy. I will be doing my presentation in International Security over whether the media portrays security of the state and individual correctly. I'm glad I got this one because I'm sure I'll be able to find a lot of resources to use and talk about so it will really cut down on the guess-work for me. In International Economic Crisis I have decided to write about the Argentinian economic crash, and particularly the International Monetary Fund's involvement afterwards.
I've also finally met all of my roommates. They are all pretty nice, though not always talkative and we all seem to have a lot of work so we're in our rooms more often than not. I sat down with one and her friend last night and talked for a while. They are both new to Ireland and have had many of the same impressions about the Irish people and culture that I have had, which I'm glad for so I don't feel like I'm the only one. Also, I've joined the UCD Super League soccer system and will find out my team next week. I'll be embarrassed most of the time since I'm so out of shape and unskilled overall at soccer. Goalkeeper would be my preference for position, as it seems the one I could do best at. Other than soccer I've joined International Student Society, Arts Society, and Commerce & Economics Society. Most of them I joined because there are a lot of nights out as a group so I can get to know people.
This is the part where the bad news comes on a little stronger, so read on at your peril.
I've had a relationship end this past weekend which has obviously hurt me a lot. It is recent so this is going to be somewhat reactionary, but not angry. After being away for so long there were bound to be changes in our feelings towards one another, and while one had them grow stronger, the other did not. She was the only friend I had over here before I came, and while all these unfortunate things were happening with classes, financial aid and homesickness she served as the ground that kept me stable. That ground is gone now, and I'm not sure how and when it will be found again. It's funny how your brain knows exactly how to remember everything suddenly when it hurts the most to see it.
I was very happy to be back here with her after so long apart; as many of my friends know, it killed me to be away from her. Perhaps I chose to come to school here a little too much because of her, but I felt it was the right decision and did not look at the possible negatives because of my feelings toward her and hers toward me during application/acceptance/arrival. It was the right decision for me to come here, and for me to give us every chance for this to work out. Life is not something to be lived too cautiously. If there is someone that you feel as though will make yours better then you should pursue that with everything you have. There is still plenty of time for anything to happen.
I miss home a lot though. I miss my best friends. I miss my family. I miss going to Wichita Brewing Company and the Anchor. I miss Aggieville and Kansas State football games (I still wear my purple). Not a lot of people love Kansas, but there's a lot to miss in Kansas. I know I'm homesick because of the recent events and it will pass, but how I wish that things were different right now. Thank you to those that have reached out to me from America to help make me feel that little bit better for that little bit of time.
Edwords
